People drive on the left side of the road here (or the "wrong" side, according to most Americans). This situation generally confounds most tourists from right-hand-driving countries such as the US, Canada, and even Latvia (although no one is quite sure how many actual Latvians visit the Bahamas each year).


Cruise ship tourist who wander up and down Bay Street are particularly afflicted by this confusion. And this, despite proudly displaying billboard-sized “KEEP LEFT” stickers on their shirts, cheerfully placed there just before they got off the ship by bubbly Julie, the chirpy activity director on some you-will-have-oodles-of-fun-and-eat-until-you-are-obese cruise ship.





Take a bunch of intrepid right-side drivers, mix in a strong desire to see the sights of the town, sprinkle with a few rental scooters or cars and you have quite a stew.


Combine this with daily traffic obstructions in Nassau such as jitneys, drivers who randomly stop in the middle of busy streets to chit-chat with someone standing on the side of the road, cavernous potholes that dot the roadways, and pedestrians who regularly cross the street everywhere else but at the actual crosswalk, and the scene deteriorates before your eyes.


I’ve done an actual scientific study of the situation, and have determined that motorists in Nassau, who have driven in these conditions for at least 6 months, experience an 89% increase in driving reflex speed.


I’ve sent these results to several major scientific journals and expect huge reaction.


For my next experiment, I intend to determine exactly why some visitors to the Bahamas believe they can consume three times the alcohol they would normally drink at home, without puking up their guts. Clearly a conundrum of epic proportions.


In the meantime, I believe I will enjoy a nice, cold Kalik.